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This article is from Today's
Native Father, issue #115, May/June, 2001. Related articles from this
issue: |
Different Patterns, Similar
Aims by David Hertzler |
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Every November a group of fathers meet at Beaver Lake Camp near Dryden, Ontario, to discover and discuss their fathering patterns. Using a simple test designed by National Center for Fathering, these dads try to identify their fathering pattern. They also try to make a generational connection by identifying their father’s fathering pattern. From surveys of over 2000 fathers who have taken this test, five typical patterns emerge. The highly satisfied father is often a man who has had a healthy childhood, has high ideals, has young children and is eager about his role as a father. The overcomer is often a man who has had a difficult childhood and is trying to provide for his children what was missing in his own childhood. The plodder is often a man who would like to be doing more for his children but is challenged by time commitments and other pressures. The struggling father often has been unable to break the pattern of his own difficult childhood. As well, economic difficulties and a poor self-image affect his view of his own fathering abilities. The discouraged father is often going through a period of change. Perhaps he is starting a new vocation or has a child in adolescence. For each pattern, the test recommends a plan of action. Several times during the workshop, the dads “huddle” or “buddy up” to discuss their test results and develop their plan of action. Additional written and group exercises help them think through the issues involved. Each dad leaves with a set of tools and a plan to enrich his relationships with both his children and his father. For more information about the next fathering workshop, contact Beaver Lake Camp, (807) 937-6748. |
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