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This article is from Today's
Native Father, issue #101, January/February, 1999. Related articles from
this issue: |
Making Each Child Feel
Special A letter to mothers by Ilva Hertzler |
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Dear Moms, I met a new friend not long ago. Her voice was warm and kind, her laughter sprinkled me with joy. In our conversation she began telling of her dad. “I had the most wonderful father. I knew I was his special child, his wonderful daughter. I loved him so much! “I remember in the summer he would work long hours. He would be gone already when I would get up in the mornings. In the evenings I would go down to the lake to wait for him to come home. I’d look over there at the point, watching for him to come around it in his boat. Especially when I had a rough day, I would go down to the lake so I could unload my problems. “After supper he’d sit down to relax, often on a stump. I would stand there between his knees and talk to him. I’d pour out all that was troubling me. He would mess with my hair, and braid it. Sometimes he’d rest his head on top of mine. And now that I look back, you know what I think he was doing? I think he was taking a snooze! He must have been that tired! But He always had time for me.” My friend is laughing softly, fondly as this memory sweeps over her. “One time after he passed away, my sister came over. We were chatting about our dad, how things were just not the same, how things fell apart after he died. And we were feeling like you do when you miss someone you love. My sister said something like, ‘But you know, I don’t know if you quite understand how I am feeling about this, because I was dad’s special child...’ “I said, ‘WHAAAT?! No I was. I was dad’s special child!’ What a shock to find out that my sister thought SHE was dad’s special child. “As we talked together, we each realized that our dad had made us both feel that we were his very own special daughter. And neither of us had realized it all these years. It was amazing! We both just had to laugh with love and affection for our dad. “Later, I talked with my brother and told him about it. Then I got another jolt. Here he thought HE was the special child!! “There were ten of us siblings. One time six of us got together and we were talking about this. Then the truth came out. Each one thought that for all these years, they were the most special child of the family. It was a lovely treasure they had in their hearts. They realized that their dad had done a good job. Each one felt that they belonged and were accepted by their dad. “Later, when I became a Christian, I thought, ‘ If my earthly father is like that, how much better would God be as my Heavenly Father!’” My friend speaks with quiet joy and love. “My earthly father taught me so much about my heavenly Father in his love for me as his daughter.” There were some things about her father that my friend could not understand or accept. But she had a chat with her Heavenly Father and left it in His hands. Today there is still that warmth and love in her voice for her father. “I loved my dad. He was a very important figure in my life.” I wish I could have known this man, this father, who had such a wonderful way with his children. Ilva |
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